What If...

I know I posted yesterday about not living in the past and enjoying the present, but last night, I laid awake wondering, "What if this had never happened...?"

What if that Sunday morning I had not passed out in church? What if I kept my story to myself and only a select few? What if things had been different?

I know it's not logical or rational thinking, but I can't help to think, "What if?"

and IF this had never happened, I wouldn't have this mess to clean up. I wouldn't have to deal with a lot of today's drama. If, If, If.... What if....

How would today be different if yesterday had not happened?

How would tomorrow be different if yesterday had not happened?

Winston Churchill once said, "If you're going through hell, keep going..."

I'm keeping going. But, how much longer? What if I am always going through hell?

Tonight I decided to meditate on Psalm 121. I'm not going to type it here, I encourage everyone to take a look at it for themselves. Instead of asking "What if..." I am going to start asking "What now..."

For I lift my eyes to the mountains, and I find that my help comes from the Lord. What now? The Lord promises in Psalm 121 that He will not sleep nor slumber. He is always watching over me, even amidst this time of "What if"-- What now? I am under complete protection and care.