Even When It's Hard

My first graders have a set of rules they follow. The general, "Treat others the way you want to be treated," etc. But also, one that I really like. It goes like this:

"Keep trying, even when it's hard."

That's so great for students to hear, because it is so easy for them to give up.

It's also easy for us to give up, even when it's hard. But when we focus on the blessings, the good things in our life, and the rewards we receive, it's so easy to keep trying, even when it's hard.

Everyone bombards me with the question: "How's teaching going?"- Don't get me wrong. I LOVE teaching, and I LOVE that so many people care about it. But after being on the go for 12+ hours, the last thing I really want to do is talk about teaching.

Because right now, reality and future are doing a number on me. I'm okay- but it's hard.

It's hard to wake up at 6:00 in the morning, be on the go, do a 45 minute commute, greet students by name, teach/help all day, do another 45 minute commute, and go to class, then eat quick, and begin doing homework for the classes by the next day.

I was out of my room this morning at 6:45 and did not return until 8:10. I kicked off my shoes, and my feet ache terribly, my eyes hang heavy, I have blister marks on my heels and other spots on my feet, and I ache from standing and moving around. It's hard.

I love it- (maybe not the homework), but it's hard.

But I remember what that rule says- "Keep trying, even when it's hard."

Here are some things that are motivating me to keep trying, even though it's hard.
-I was able to greet every one of my students this morning by name! (I finally have the names memorized! WOO!)

-I taught my first math lesson today. We played "Five Frame Fun." (working on adding up to 5 and part to whole relationship skills). It went GREAT!

-I went to the school's chapel today. My old prof, who taught me how to teach music, led some of the responsories and all of the songs. She is amazing and wonderful at what she does, and I am so blessed to be working among her once again!

-I also cannot describe how amazing my co-op teacher is. She is absolutely phenomenal and we have such a great relationship.

-We celebrated a student's birthday today, we sang to him and got cupcakes.

-I keep getting dandelions and other weed-like flowers from my students. I feel bad not knowing what to do with them, but I love the thoughts behind them.

-I read "Stand Tall, Molly Lou Melon" today. To my surprise, when I finished the book, students began chanting, "READ IT AGAIN! READ IT AGAIN!" We had time, so I did. I love those 3 words.

-Tonight, after class, and a quick scarf-down of dinner, I was able to help my good buddy, who is awesome. He did an internship and needed his best friends to sit through individual presentations and mock question and answer things with his supervisor about roping in new interns. I had no interest, not really any time, and I was totally exhausted, but I helped. And you know what? It felt so good. It is so great to do something for someone else and be a good friend. I am blessed to have this guy in my life.

Pebble Dropping

As I mentioned yesterday, we're teaching about getting along and being kind to others. Which, that reminds me of one of Sunday's texts. I have a feeling this is going to be a long (but good post, so please do read). 


The text, which I will post, because it is so important for our lives, is this: (Romans 12:9-21)
Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;  if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.  In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.


I could probably write a novel on those words! But I won't. I referred to a story the other day by the Brothers Grimm, Hansel and Gretel. In the story, Hansel leaves white pebbles in his pocket to drop along as he and Gretel go to find the candy house. He leaves white pebbles so they can find their way home.


Today, I ask you, what kind of white pebbles are you dropping? If people were to walk along your trail of life, what kind of tracks would they find?


This passage in Romans calls us to drop white pebbles- tracks- of love.  Genuine love. Love must be sincere. 


I had quite a few moments with my students today- they are really struggling getting along. After recess, student A came in sobbing. Several students came up to me and said "Student A is sad." So I walked over and asked what was wrong. She said "Student B said she doesn't want to be my friend any more and that she hates me."


This was not just another elementary school occurrence- that girl meant it. And as any human would, Student A was devastated. I felt like a knife went through my heart because that instance is still so real in my life. I delivered the only words I knew how:
"I know how hard that is and how much it hurts. But look around you- there are so many people here who love you and want to be your friend. I want to be your friend and Jesus wants to be your friend too. Let's focus on those people and not think about person B."


That stopped her crying, but unless you've heard those words from a friend or family member, it is hard to realize just how deep of a wound they leave.


We had our lesson today again about the porcupine and teddy bear words. We talked about forgiving, and instead of fighting back, we need to speak up and let people how much it hurts us, and that we can forgive them. 


Let me tell you another story. This example of love reminds me of a story I heard about Marie.   This is a true story I read in a pamphlet.

Marie was on the way to her son’s game when she decided to stop for a quick bite to eat. She pulled into the drive through lane, stopped to place her order, and rolled down her window. She found herself face-to-face with a gunman. It was a young man, and he was holding the gun right to her head.

Terrified, Marie asked what the man wanted, but he just motioned with his gun. She asked if he wanted her purse, and he still motioned. She dropped her purse out the window. The gunman didn’t leave. He looked across to the other side of the car.  She realized there was an accomplice on the other side.

The gunman made a motion toward the backseat and Marie decided that whatever they were going to do, they wanted to get in the car with her. With that frightening thought, she hit the gas pedal. At the same moment, the gunman shot her in the jaw. The bullet went in one side of her face and out the other. He picked up her purse and fled with the other man, not realizing there were witnesses who noticed the license number of their car.

Marie, drenched in blood, drove around to the window and asked for help. A worker drove her to a hospital a few blocks away. As they prepared Marie for surgery, she mentally focused on the face of the gunman so she would be able to identify him, if necessary. She didn’t want to forget his face. When Marie was in surgery, the police apprehended two suspects.

The next year of Marie’s life was filled with surgeries, physical pain, emotional changes, court appearances, the care of loved ones, and anger. She didn’t realize the extent of her anger and hatred toward the man who shot her, but she could forget neither his face nor what he had done. The gunman plead guilty, apologized to Marie in court, and helped convict the accomplice to this and other crimes. He was sentenced to 12 years in prison.

Marie didn’t want to feel like a victim. She wanted to be strong. She thought if she gave up her anger she would feel weak. A friend asked if she was fearful of the of the time when the gunman would be set free. Marie replied that she had daydreamed about him walking into her house, but this time the story was reversed. She would shoot him in the jaw. She wanted him to know the pain she lived with, to know how it had affected her family and turned her life upside down.

As time went on and Marie’s life started to calm down, she found herself wanting to sit down and talk to the man who had shot her. She wasn’t sure why, but the desire was there and finally she acted on it, waiting several months for her wish to become a reality. She wasn’t going in anger; she simply wanted to talk to him face to face.

She met with him in a conference room at the prison, accompanied by liaisons. For a moment Marie didn’t know what to say. She asked about his upbringing and he told her stories of his life. She told him about her family and the difficulty her sons had with the shooting. Marie told him how she was hurt, physically and emotionally, and talked of changes in her daily life and family. The young man and Marie shared stories. They expressed no anger; did not raise their voices. After a short break, Marie found herself saying something she had never expected; it just came out of her bullet-pierced mouth. She called the gunman by name and said “I-I for…give you.”

Marie notes that she want to the prison for herself. But the gift of forgiveness brought a change to Marie’s life and the life of the young man from the streets who had shot her. After the man was released on parole, Marie contacted his parole officer. Knowing his upbringing, Marie wondered if he would need help finding a job and offered to help. She was told that he had not only found a job but was doing well, finding new life after his time in prison. Marie met with him again, together with his parole officer. She found out that their visit in prison had made quite an impact on him, as it had her. The anger was gone. Forgiveness was given. Lives were changed.

Marie was dropping pebbles of love, and anyone who would come across Marie’s path would notice her willingness to forgive her enemies, and show love and compassion to them.

I admire Marie. You know, I could search out those who will not forgive me (I have tried to do like Marie, but it was refused several times). and say:  “WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU! What is so wrong in your life that you think you can treat a human being- much less, a child of GOD this way! And, How dare you make me feel like this was my fault. This is the question I really want answered- what I can’t understand is how you could do this when you knew what I was going through. Let me tell you something- you do not show that kind of hatred when you are a Christian. If you have a problem, you work it out. You do not sit back and say, “I don’t want to speak to you or look at you, so I’m going to glare at you and ignore any try you have to make things up with me,” Like a BABY. As a professional, as a family member, you are not going to make it in life if you continue these behaviors. I wished you had learned that you do not treat another human being this way. If there’s anyone I expect to show Christian love, it’s FUTURE church professionals!”

But you know what? If I ever did have a chance, I wouldn’t say that. Those are porcupine words. Those are not leaving tracks of love.

I would let the individuals know how much they hurt me. I would share with them how it has changed my life, and how well I am doing, and then I would let them know (again) that I have forgiven them.

That would be leaving tracks of love- the white pebbles that people will be able to follow and see what kind of a person I am.

As Max Lucado said so well, “See your enemies, not as God’s failures, but as God’s projects.”

I know that’s hard- and evidently Paul knew that too. Because he talks about vengeance belonging to the Lord.  It’s so easy to say, “Hey, God, you’re moving a little bit too slow than I would like here, I’ll take care of this one and get even, thanks.”

I pray that I see my enemy as God’s child.  And that I leave tracks of love for them to follow.

And I pray that you’re leaving those tracks of genuine love for others to follow you. As I have come to know many of my blog followers I know you do that- that’s why I follow you. (No pun intended). You leave tracks behind- white pebbles- that I see your love and I am happy to follow you and call you my friend.

Do not be overcome by evil or evil tracks you see- be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Help those in need and the pebbles of love will fall out of your pockets in abundance. Jesus loves you, and left quite the trail of pebbles for you to follow in His love. Now, are you going to live it, and continue with the pebble dropping?

Be a Marie. Forgive. Love. Show love, mercy, and drop your pebbles. You never know who will find them and follow you.


Blessings:
-I had another AMAZING day of teaching! SO many good things happened! I got to read "Weekend With Wendell" by Kevin Henkes. 


-I met with my university supervisor this evening. He's so great, and has already shared a lot of wisdom with me. Even though he's grading me, I think I'll get along with him just fine!


-Oh, here is my desk!!! It's tiny, and crammed with stacks of paper already, but I love it! 

-So one of my good friends called just a bit ago and said "Hey buddy, I'm inviting my best friends for coffee tomorrow evening and I want you to come hear about my internship from the summer." It's just amazing to know someone is thinking about you and wants you a part of their life!

-I got to celebrate (briefly) a birthday with another great guy! 

My smile still stretches and wraps around my head. Something tells me it's going to stay that way for a while. And you know what, that's okay! It means I am leaving pebbles/tracks of love. 

A Smile Wrapped Around My Head

Thank you for all of your prayers as I began my first day as a student teacher!

I can honestly say.... The day could not have been more perfect. I woke up, packed my lunch:

and then went to my first class- Math methods. My professor stopped her lecture, and then she said, "Dylan, can I just say how much I love your laugh and the fact you are laughing at such an early hour on a Monday morning?" I smiled really big! Then, later, I taught the class the "Put Your Label On Your Answer" song. 

Then I had my commute to school. There's about a 3 mile stretch or so I have to drive through the city to get to the school, but it will always be worth it!

I was greeted warmly by my students with hugs, all kinds of questions, (2 of the most common were, "Are you married?" and "How many kids do you have?"). They were great! After first recess, one girl brought me in a bouquet of dandelions! My smile grew even bigger! I didn't know that was possible! 

Then, I observed for a bit, and then we had lunch. The students all fought over who got to hold my hand on the way there, and then who got to sit by me. I told them we'd take turns over the next few weeks. 

After lunch, we had outside recess, and they all wanted me to play on the playground, I went on it, but just watched them, and that satisfied them. Then they wanted me to push them on the merry go round but they said I didn't push fast enough. I thought my smile was a mile wide by now, but it expanded even further!

Then I got to read my book, First Day Jitters, and then the ABC book I made. They asked so many questions, and we added the books to the classroom bookshelf.  My smile was gigantic, but it still grew bigger.

In the afternoon, we talked about being kind to other people. We talked about "porcupine words" and "teddy bear words"- porcupine words hurt other people, but teddy bear words make other people feel good. They drew slips, and I read them out loud (some of the porcupine words in a very mean tone of voice!) and they had to decide whether they were porcupine or teddy bear words.

I ended the day talking with my co-op and we are planning a unit on worms. She's getting live worms brought in, and we're going to watch them grow and go through their life cycle. I bought some worm books tonight, I'm so excited! My smile just kept right on growing.

In today's newsletter, my co-op teacher wrote: "Beginning today, we have a student teacher working with us in our classroom, Mr. T. Mr. T is a student in his final year at ------ . I have had the privilege of working with him in the past, and am very excited that he will bring his love for books and reading to our classroom. " YES! She knows me so well! I think I defied the impossible and my smile grew bigger still.

After class tonight I went to work and found this:

My smile was probably wrapped around my head at this point. Those bars were from my boss, for my birthday (on the 19th). They are chocolate-peanut butter-butterscotch-peanut-marshmallow. They are AMAZING and she knows they're my favorite!!!! 

My smile is still so big, it's wrapped around my head. Dreams are coming true, and nothing can or will get in my way from achieving my goals and pursuing happiness. 

Choose Your Own Adventure

It’s time for Scripture Sunday! I had a hard time choosing between the 3 amazing texts that we had today-

Old Testament- Jeremiah 15:15-21

Epistle- Romans 12:9-21

Gospel- Matthew 16:21-28

I am going to reflect on the Gospel today, but, I might do the same for the Epistle this week sometime because it’s so meaningful.

I know I’ve written about cross-bearing here, but I want to look at this text from a different angle.

It kind of reminds me of those books I loved in late elementary school.

“Choose-Your-Own-Adventure”

In these books, the reader got to be the protagonist and we got to pick which direction we wanted to take.  For instance, it went something like this:

You are walking and you come across a cave.

If you choose to go in, go to page 17
If you choose to go on, go to page 22.
If you choose to turn around, go to page 13.

Then, you’d choose which page you want to go to, and follow the story from there. Each book had about 24 different directions the story could take.

I think in today’s Gospel lesson, Peter tries to intervene into the life of Jesus and try to tell Him to choose His own adventure.

Jesus didn't listen to the temptation. He understood what He had to do and how He had to do it.

Sometimes in life, I think it's easy to think, "That's not part of my script! This is not part of my adventure! Where is my right to choose!"

Especially since becoming ill- and having all of the struggles and hardships in the last year. I think many times I was saying, "I am not going to choose this adventure, God, I want to go back a few pages and take a different route! I want a different story! This isn't fair, I didn't ask for this."

And sometimes, I acted like I was writing the book- like I was choosing my own adventure. 

But God intervened. God said, 

"I've got a script for you. Let me rewrite the script of your life. Let me choose your adventure. Follow me."

And He's called me and I plan to follow to the very end. I know He says "If anyone must follow me..." - and I know that means it's going to mean denying myself and denying what I think is my right to choose my own adventure.

I know that letting God write my story involves me to determine when I stop colliding with God. When I stop trying to turn the page backward and say, "Wait! I didn't want this!" - I need to get rid of the part that gets in the way of His way. And that means ridding myself of pride, anxiety, anger, and selfishness. 

And there are times, I will say, where I can choose my own adventure. The times where I have the opportunity to take up my cross, and make decisions like I am a Christian. Make decisions that I know are according to the will of God. 

But there's good news with that. When we bear our crosses, Jesus is right there with us. He makes it light for us. He says, "You are mine, I'm not leaving you alone, I'll bear that cross with you."

And when we mess up, it's okay. He says, "I've made some great revisions and I've got a different adventure in mind than what you had planned."

It is my desire that His will becomes my will. Since His victory on Easter becomes my victory. 

Blessings:

-I had breakfast today with one of my good friends, and he told this joke that some of you might find mildly junior high, but I thought it was hilarious, and I was laughing so loud, everyone was staring at us. This is what he said:

"Oh, that reminds me, have you heard of the movie Constipation?"

"No, I don't think I have."

"That's because it hasn't come out yet."

(Apologies if anyone was offended by that joke!)

-An amazing worship experience, complete with an amazing arrangement of "This is The Feast", communion, and fellowship with people afterwards, including getting to see both of my professor's new babies!

-My coworker and I shared our Sunday afternoon shift last year. We are sharing it again this year, and it was so good to talk to her again, and we are going to have dinner sometime this week or next.

-Jennifer from the cafeteria noticed something and she said this to me (regarding those who are still acting like I don't exist): "You know, if it wasn't you they were doing it to, they'd probably be doing it to someone else. And if it were someone else, that person might not be as strong as you." Good point. I guess, if I can spare someone else this pain, then it is a blessing... (I gritted my teeth as I said that- I still have a struggle accepting this as a blessing.)

-I am doing an author study with my kids in the coming weeks, and I found some books by her that I can use- they are old, but I had no idea she wrote them! This makes things so much more interesting for our author study!

Please say a prayer for me tonight! My first day teaching is tomorrow! I am not all that nervous, but it is kind of stressful thinking about all of the work that will need to be done in the next 8 weeks. 

If you want to follow some of my teaching stories, things learned, lessons taught, etc. you can find me over at Wordpress. Don't worry- I will still post here daily!) 

Shut Out And Shut Down

I was working on some lessons today. While trying to write something up, I came across this old fairy tale from the Brothers Grimm.  The story is told of a father, mother, and son, who lived in the grandfather's house. Grandfather had gladly welcomed his extended family into his home. He made it clear that everything he had should be considered as theirs. Saying he really didn't need such a big place; grandpa's bedroom was soon given to the mother and father; his fields were planted and harvested as if they belonged to the mother and father. 

At first the young family was most thankful. But then, as the years past, grandpa's presence in their lives became a burden, a nuisance, a disgrace, an embarrassment. When friends came to call, grandpa was shuttled off to the upstairs; when conversation was made at the dinner table, grandpa was ignored. Finally, at one supper, grandpa was bumped as he lifted the fork to his mouth. The food fell off the fork, hit his shirt, and ended up staining the tablecloth. Upset with the mess, mother talked with her husband and they agreed, grandpa should be moved away from the family dinner table.

And so it was. Grandpa was given a spot in the corner of the kitchen where he could sit on a stool and eat from a bowl. From a distance he sat in silence, watching his family eat his food, from his plates, in his kitchen. Then, one day, as the mother was bringing food to the table, it looked like she would trip on one of her son's toys. Grandpa raised his voice and called a warning. As he stood up to catch the mother, his plate went flying. His food went all over the floor and the plate shattered. Distraught, grandpa's son shouted, "If you cannot eat better than a pig, then you shall eat like a pig." And the son built a small wooden pig trough for his father. Grandpa was banished from the kitchen and moved to the front porch. There, by himself, he ate his meals out of the trough of a pig. 

Things might have stayed that way forever, if it had not been for that day when the mother and father came upon their little boy playing out in the yard with some small pieces of wood. They asked, "What are you making?" With pride, the boy held up his project, smiled, and said, "I'm building a trough for you and mama. That way, someday, when I'm big, I'll be ready to feed you the same way you feed grandpa." Now, because this is one of Grimm's happy-ever-after fairy tales, the story ends with mother and father realizing grandpa's value, bringing him back to the table, and being appreciative of all he had done for them. 


Is that not how sometimes we treat God? Or other people who are God's children?


We forget what's most important- love, and we shut God out, we shut people out, and we shut them down.


I'm not saying God is like a fumbly old grandpa- but we take the mentality that we forget about what He has done for us, and we think of Him as shut out and shut down.


When we run into problems- people and things we just don't know what to do with, we don't use Jesus as a first response, we use Him as a last resort.


But like that family welcomed that grandpa back into their lives, we are called to do the same thing with God and with others- and stay connected to Him.


When we are attached to Him, we will celebrate.
We will have more than enough joy to share with others.


I don't know if you've ever felt the sting of someone who doesn't want to be in your presence. Someone who has pushed you away.  But it hurts. It sucks- believe me, I know that full well. I still face that every single day. It feels like a knife is being slammed into your back. Wedged there. 


If you know what it feels like to be kicked down, punched in the stomach, knocked in the teeth, beaten in the head, and left there to lie- you know it hurts and it stings.


So why do that to God? Why do that to another person?


Remember all He has done for you and all He has shown you? Yeah, think of that the next time you put Him as a last resort. Think of that the next time you refuse Him by refusing someone else. 


Remember that God sent His only Son to die for you- He loves you that much and would run an extra mile for you and for your benefit. Welcome Him. Love Him. 


I know my posts have been really challenging the last few days- but my eyes have been opened and I wanted to share some of those thoughts with you.


Blessings from the last few days:
-Yesterday's day long workshop was on love and logic teaching- I (no pun intended) loved it- it teaches about teaching and disciplining with empathy, and I found a lot of real life applications beyond a classroom setting.


-I finished the ABC about me book to introduce myself to my students on Monday! Here is a sample of two pages. Yes, the "X" was a bit of a stretch, but there was no X word I could find to describe something I liked or something I enjoyed. Keep in mind this book is for very, very small children so it needed to be kept very simple.

- I am getting a LOT of work for this week accomplished today! Not quite ready yet, but I have one whole day to finish the rest!


-We watched Pirates of the Caribbean 4 last night on an outdoor movie screen. I haven't seen 1-3, but I was able to follow the plot really well and I laughed a lot!


-We also played Peanut (Nertz) with a group- I had some embarrassing moments, but many times during the game, we were screaming with hysteria! It was a great time!


-And I have made 2 new friends, with guys who are awesome brothers in Christ! Yes, I am a 5th year Senior, and yes, I still make new friends!


-I talked for about an hour with Jennifer, from the cafeteria today! It was great to catch up with her! 


-I am doing all sorts of new teacher things on my iPad2. I am excited to use it for practical use in the coming week as I adjust to becoming a teacher!


-Tonight, I am going to a Remedy Drive concert. It should be great!

How's That Working Out For You?

Children are very apt to become angry and pouty when they don’t get their way.

One instructional strategy I’ve found to be very effective when a child doesn’t get his or her way is saying, “You get what you get and you don’t get upset.”

This week, I heard a quote that made me think of that strategy. The quote says,

“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got.”

How do those two relate? If you are doing something wrong, and you don’t like the results, well, you’re going to get what you get, so don’t get upset.

And how’s that working out for you?

How are you managing with doing what you’ve always been doing and getting what you’ve always been getting?

If you’re great- if you’re totally happy- then, well, I guess stop reading. But if you want a challenge, one that I am personally working on, then read on.

Are you down in the dumps? How’s that working out for you?

Are you wallowing in self pity? How’s that working out for you?

Are you overwhelmed with anxiety and worry? How’s that working out for you?

Are you harboring feelings of anger? How’s that working out for you?

Are you ignoring a brother or sister in Christ? How’s that working out for you?

Are you in an overall state of discontentment? How’s that working out for you?

My friends, if none of those things are working out for you, then it’s time to change your thinking. Change your mind. As Martin Luther said,

“You can’t keep evil thoughts from coming in your head, but you can keep them from staying there.”

It’s time to change your mind! It’s time for me to change my mind!

When you encounter a hard situation, when you feel the need to be cruel to someone who is different than you, when you are worrying, I think we need to be honest with ourselves.

As a speaker in chapel said this week, so bluntly and honestly...  if we encounter something or someone we don’t like, it’s time to SUCK IT UP!

That sounds blunt and harsh, but it’s true! Read 1 Corinthians 16:13-14.

When we walk limp, when we focus too much on our own misery, self-pity, and unhappiness, what are we accomplishing? Change your mind! Do everything in love! Declare what God has done for you! See Psalm 96:34.

Declare His love for you! Even your enemies! Even those who treat me wrong.

You ask,

“What if they don’t accept me?”
“What if they don’t like me?”
“What if they are mean back to me?”

I say, SO WHAT?!

I can hear some of you saying, “Gee whiz, Dylan, you’re being harsh.” These aren’t my rules. These come from God, who calls us to love with an unconditional love.

God challenges us to live as He has first loved us. Share what He has done. To value what is valuable.

 Do everything in love! Don’t be a wimp! Don’t be a whiner! Don’t be shallow!
DO SOMETHING because of what God has done for you!
GET IN THE WAY!

God loves you! Why not live that way?! Why not treat others with the same love?!

God believes in you! I do too!

Who's The Winner Now?

I have to say I am beyond impressed with my five methods course professors this semester. My schedule includes some morning methods courses and some after school methods courses, meanwhile in between I teach all day.

Last night, I met the Science Methods professor, who, is an adjunct who I have never met before.

After class, I asked her a question, and we ended up conversing for an hour or so. Somewhere along the line, some health problems she had were brought up, and so we discussed my health problems. After I told her what I was going through she said,

"Wow! I NEVER would have guessed!"

I guess that was a very high compliment. And I took it as one. However, someone that evening remarked, "It's great to see you're cured of your depression."

I cringed for a minute , because, I am not cured. There is not a cure for depression.

However, I've learned how to deal with it. Things have reminded me since being back to school that I'm still fighting a battle. But I'm victorious now- now, I'm the winner.

Being contacted for Academic Support and academic counseling, being reminded that I need to go back to therapy- that hit me. I've got a lifelong illness, but now I'm the victor- not the victim.

Like the professor said she never would have guessed, I never would have guessed I would be the person I am today. I have grown so much- in joy, in confidence, in trust, in optimism, and in so many more things.

And because I'm now the winner, here are the blessings I have been surrounded by in the last few days:
-The conversation with the science methods professor was amazing.

-Yesterday's day long workshop was amazing!

-We got cookies today before our workshop!

-I got the "Icky Sticky" Bible story book today. I look forward to using it with my students for Jesus time next week (yeah, I get to teach in a parochial school! WOO!)

-I had lunch with my amazing mentor professor today. She gave me a HUGE stack of literacy resources to use this year, and I have a "collection box" in her office where she's going to keep pulling resources and giving them to me! YES!

-I met with my co-op last night. I am making an ABC All-About-Me book to introduce myself to my students, and finding a read aloud for the first day.

-I found out that next Monday I get to observe all day, then Tuesday I begin individual conferences with writers, and Thursday I am teaching writer's workshop!!

-And Friday I think I get to teach Jesus time!

-I am still bumping into people and getting big hugs and warm welcomes back to school. I think I've seen just about every one of my friends and professors now, and gotten to give them all a hug, and I have a lot of people who want to catch up with me!

-I found chocolate marshmallows in the store today. I bought a bag and they are surprisingly good. I think I'll go chomp down on a few now.

The Trouble I've Seen

I still remember a childhood TV show that featured a big purple elephant. I have no recollection of what the show was about, or what it was called. But I remember on several occasions, this elephant would lower his head, and sing in a very sorrowful voice:

“Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen,

Nobody knows my sorrow.
Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen,

Glory Hallelujah.”

Talk about self pity. I don’t remember what trials the pseudo elephant was enduring, but, he sure felt like he was the only one who faced such things.

Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen.

Nobody knows my sorrow.

Have you ever felt that way? As though nobody here on earth could ever possibly understand your hardships and trials?

Have you ever been so hurt, so down, so depressed, that if someone were to say, “I know how you feel,” you would smack them? You would say,

“You don’t know what I’ve gotta go through, I’ve got my own thing going on, and you don’t know how hard it is, so just butt out and leave me alone.”

I’ve had times like that. Where it felt like nobody understood the trouble I’ve seen, and nobody knew my sorrow.

In our opening worship service for the year, which, was phenomenal, the pastor delivering the message said something that grabbed me and shook me by the collar. He said something to the extent of:

“You are never ever allowed to say again, ‘Nobody understands how I feel.’”

No matter how hard life has come and smacked you upside the head, no matter how much someone has hurt you, no matter how you much you feel that all of your hope has been drained, hear these words:

Jesus understands how you feel.

Let me repeat that.

Jesus understands how you feel.

As many of you know, I’m about to enter what will be both a very rewarding, and at the same time very challenging 8 weeks of my life- student teaching.

I’m not really nervous, but the amount of pressure, stress, demands, etc. it puts on a person can be taxing.

Our new program director/professor was speaking to us yesterday. She said, “You’re going to feel like you’re not getting enough rest, you’re going to be stressed, tired, overwhelmed, and feel like you’re overworked.”

And then she held up a picture. Of her new baby son.

She said “I’m right there with you- and I’m pulling for you.”

Seriously, this professor is amazing.  She knows what stress, sleepless nights, etc. can do to a person. And she wanted to let us know we’re not alone.

And when we feel that way, God does the same thing for us.

He holds up a picture of His only son, risen from the dead, and Jesus says, “I’m right there with you- I’m pulling for you.” He’s been there, He understands, and He wants to help you.

You know, I only discovered recently that the song I mentioned earlier has an alternate, original version, one that does not seem so secular. The second line is changed. The original song goes…

“Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen,

Nobody knows but Jesus.”

Have you seen trouble? So has Jesus. And He wants to help you through it. So let Him. Be at peace.  Somebody knows the troubles you’ve seen. Somebody knows your sorrows. 

You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet!

Warning: This post contains a lot of JOY- which may or may not be contagious- you have been warned. :)


It was once said that the greatest response to life was to be joyful. I find that to be exceptionally true. 


You know, if you remember reading some of my posts over the summer, you'll notice that I've made a lot of improvements. I thought I was feeling great and life couldn't get any better.


Boy, was I wrong. I came back to school, I was on top of the world. 


If I could write this in all caps, screaming, bursting with joy, I would, but I haven't found a word processor yet that correctly translates my emotions into fonts. 


Anyway, I thought I was feeling good over the summer. Little did I know, that was mild compared to the joy I have just come on.


I never, ever knew it would be possible to feel as good as I do right now. 
I never knew my heart could hold this much joy, my spirit this much excitement, my attitude this much optimism, my smile unable to be turned upside down, my hope so undiminished, my desire to share my joy with others. I never knew it was possible to feel this way.


I hope you're catching on to my excitement. Life is as good as it has ever been, and I cannot stop thanking God for doing all He has done for me, and putting so many wonderful things and people into my life. A verse that is in my heart right now that I am holding dearly is Psalm 34:1:
I will always thank the Lord; I will never stop praising Him.


I know that always is a long time and you're never really supposed to say never, but that is the prayer of my heart- I cannot stop thanking God for the blessings He has not only shown me in the last few days, but also the last year of my life.


It's almost like God blessed me this summer, and said, "You ain't seen nothin' yet!" , and now He has blessed me even more tremendously, and maybe saying the same thing- I am really thrilled to find out what other blessings, opportunities, etc. life has in store. 


Here are a few reasons (and happenings) that have contributed to my uncontainable joy:
-Friday- My birthday!!!! I had so many Facebook posts, texts, calls, cards, etc. that I definitely was not forgotten about. I got a camera, ipad, a tub of teaching props, and most importantly, a lot of LOVE! The evening I celebrated with my parents, grandparents, sister, and great aunt and uncle. We ate at a restaurant called "The Glacier Bay" - it was fun, and afterwards we had chocolate cake, ice cream cake, and played Quelf until our sides were hurt from laughing so much!


-Saturday I moved back to school. I had not been on campus for 10 minutes and I was greeted with a big bear hug from one of my friends. It continued into the evening, and it was such a GREAT feeling to be back among so many amazing people!


-Sunday morning I got to worship at the church here in town. When the organ sounded, and the strong congregational singing kicked in, I almost teared up- I forgot how beautiful it was. I was greeted in church with more hugs and happy emotions!


-Sunday evening was our opening worship- and it was so amazing, awe-inspiring, touching, and meaningful- I was in tears again! Of course, there were more hugs and happy reunions after church. It is so great to see all of these people!


-Afterward, I also saw one of my theology professors, and he is an amazing preacher. He has offered me a job of once a month playing organ in the congregation where he is serving as vacancy pastor... YES! YES! YES! He said "Meet me at my house, and we'll drive there together. It will be a good way for us to catch up."


-Monday was my first methods class, and workshops- I could go on about how re-affirming they are for my career choice, but I won't. I AM SO EXCITED TO BE A TEACHER!!!


-Monday also brought more hugs, and big hugs from so many professors!


-I also found out I will be MEETING JERRY PINKNEY at an endowment event!!! If you don't know Jerry Pinkney, you can google him, but he is an AWARD WINNING Children's book illustrator- his most recent book, The Lion and the Mouse, won last year's Caldecott!!! I didn't think I was going to be able to go because of money, but a GENEROUS donation is ALLOWING me to go!!! I am SO EXCITED!!!!


-I got a big hug from the campus pastor and he said we needed to do a chapel hymn sing together sometime. YES! 


-My mentor professor is collecting resources for me and we're having lunch together Thursday!!!! Again, you get the idea that I am excited.


-I have about 27 people that I need to have "catch up" times with!!! Again, excited.


-Another Theology prof. said to me today, "Please stop by so we can catch up!"


-I have been told my so many people, "Dylan, you look so great!!! You look amazing- so healthy and well!" YES!


I want to share an e-mail that a professor sent me yesterday:

Dylan,

You look great, healthy, happy, and with such a nice tone in your complexion!! Hatred and anger make people look ugly!!  Health, positiveness, faith in God, faith in yourself, and the support of friends and family, makes people look beautiful!! Not in that order, as Faith in Our Saviour comes first and foremost!!  

I love you!

-Another e-mail from a lady back home said this:

I am praying for you every day, that you will be able to balance all that is before you, your classes, along with student teaching, and I know you can do it with the help of the Lord.  When you get discouraged and think the load is too much, remember what you have already accomplished... especially how quickly and how well you learned to play the piano and organ in such a short time.  With God on your side you can do whatever you put your mind to and I know you will enjoy this last year of your college career. 

-So many encouraging people in my life!

-Also, after workshop today, the professor said this to me, which definitely made my day! (I had been laughing really hard all day):

"We need to keep you around because of your laugh. It's contagious and a stress reliever."

 

-I got this in my mailbox today. It was attached to a Baby Ruth candy bar. I don't know who sent it, but the challenge is gladly accepted!

-This is long and I know I am forgetting things! But the point is here- I am on top of the world, and I am excited about life. God blesses me far beyond what I deserve!

What are some exciting things God is doing in your life?

Is There Going To Be A Test?

School started today. (I am still not posting live- I will be back tomorrow!- I knew that I was going to have a crazy first day- methods, workshops, methods, work- and methods and workshops all day tomorrow, but I will be back! I promise!) 

With school starting, you can count on something. Tests.

I really do not like tests. If you want to assess me, let me demonstrate my knowledge with real life applications and experiences- not some fill-in-the-blank-bubble exam.

Have you ever considered that life is a series of exams?

I heard a story about a class that showed up to take an exam at their university. It was going to be a tough one, they knew.

When they came to the room, they saw on the board: Due to a conflict, your professor is unable to give you your test in this classroom. He is waiting in the gymnasium.

An audible sigh echoed throughout the room when the students realized this meant they had to walk all the way across campus.

The class had to pass the hospital on the way to take the exam. They saw a man stumbling around in front of the building. Most knew this man, he was blind, and his wife had just given birth to a baby in the hospital.

Nonetheless, the class hurried along and passed the bookstore. A woman with a crying baby came out, looking exhausted, and she tripped and dropped all of her books. She struggled to pick them up as the baby screamed and screamed.

Soon, they came upon a fire hydrant where a dog was tied up. It was hot and the owner must have set the dish too far, because the dog looked dehydrated and his nose could not reach the bowl set out for him. Many felt sorry for the dog, but not wanting to be late for the exam, they hurried along.

When they arrived at the gym, a car pulled up, and the maintenance man came out. He left his lights on and hurried into the building.

They entered, and the professor stood, with his arms cross. The silence became uncomfortable.

He motioned to the door, and in came the blind man, the woman with the baby, the dog and its owner, and the maintenance man.

These people had been planted along the way to test if they had learned the lesson whilst studying the story of the good Samaritan. They all failed.

Is God giving you a test?

Abraham was tested. Jesus was tested by Satan. Scan the Bible and you’ll see tests.

I can think of a few exams I’m taking. Maybe you’re taking them too.

Some of us are in exams. Jesus is giving us the test- the love test.

There is perhaps someone in your life you’re having a hard time loving. Friend? Brother? Parent? Someone who doesn’t think, look, or act like you do?

The love test happens all the time.

Another human comes into our lives, and you say, “God help me speak and act with love and compassion and truth. Here is someone who is difficult for me. Help me tell them about you and what you mean to me and what you have done for me.”

God is looking for people who are willing to love.

The will of God says that we love one another. And that we are able to love because He first loved us. We are empowered to love because He showed us His boundless love.

Maybe some of you are taking the endurance test.

Sometimes we are going through difficulties, and don’t know if we will ever find relief for it. Sometimes God seems silent and indifferent in the situation

Will you keep going even when you don’t know why it’s happening, or if or when you will get relief? Will you keep going with the faith that one day He will set everything right? Will you trust that the Lord is good?

What kind of test are you taking?

While it is good to strive to pass these tests, fear not. Because Jesus stood the test of being mocked, beaten, and crucified, we no longer have to worry about failing God. We take tests, but the grade is there- We are perfect in His eyes because Jesus died and rose again on Easter morning.

Strive to love one another. Strive to endure through the hard times. Find confidence and hope knowing that the victory is won, and your test score is perfect.

Guest Post: Set The World On Fire

Today's guest post is brought to you by Just Me, who blogs over at Getting Out of My Boat. Please stop by and check out her blog if you haven't already! Her posts will encourage and inspire you to do great things for your faith. 


I will be back soon! In the meantime, please read and take this post to heart!
(PS- If you want to write a guest post in the future, just let me know!) 
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Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire. - St Catherine of Siena

Do you know who you are? Do you know who you were made to be? 

For most of my teens, I had pretty low self-esteem. I knew I had a couple of good qualities but I also believed I was no fun to be around, and I thought that if I met me, I wouldn't want to spend any time getting to know me. I had very little confidence in myself, and didn't really believe anyone could truly like me for me. I spent a long time believing that if I could be more ___, less ___, could do ____ better, I'd get it all worked out and my life would miraculously change. I'd be cool. Confidence would come naturally. Everyone would want to be my friend.

In the last couple of years, things have really changed for me. But not because I changed. Things have changed for me because I started to figure out who I was, and more importantly, toembrace that. If you read my blog, you'll know that I've written a lot about identity this year. I've realised, among other things, that maybe being a bit of an introvert is simply part of who I am. I'm a good supporter; an organiser; a behind-the-scenes kind of girl. I'm not a leader; I'm probably never going to spend a whole lot of time in the spotlight. Those things used to bother me, because I thought that's what I should be aiming for, but now, I'm learning to be really happy as I am.

Don't you think music sounds better with harmonies? I do. I think it's beautiful. Sometimes there'll be an obvious melody, with some other parts in the background, and other times there'll be a whole load of different parts that blend together perfectly, with no one more dominant than any other. One tune on its own - sure, sometimes that can sound great, but when a lot of complementary parts come together, there's just something amazing about that. And I think life's the same. Sometimes we do okay being independent from everyone else's lives, but I think that when we recognise our specific role in a bigger picture, it's just incredible. We've all got different parts to play in life. The world needs some leaders, some back-stage workers; some practical people, some spontaneous; some vehement optimists, some realists. We were created to be unique and life works best when we all embrace the roles we were designed to fill. 

My best friends today are almost entirely the same people they were five or six years ago. So I can't have been that awful, right? They must have genuinely liked me all along, the only difference is, now I like me too (and hopefully they can see that, and like me more because of it)! Do you know how freeing that is?! I'm sure I've still got a lot of learning and growing to do. I may never be the kind of person who walks into a room commanding all the attention. I may never be comfortable doing public speaking. But I can tell you right now, with confidence, that I am now comfortable living. 

How do you react in front of a camera? I wonder if that might be a good way to gauge someone's self-esteem levels. There are hardly any photos of me from my early teens. Gradually I started to be more okay with being in photos, but only if someone else was in the picture too, and also only with a smile. I have a couple of friends who can't help but pull funny faces for the camera. I used to think that was kind of stupid and I thought everyone should just smile in pictures. But all those photos of me.. they all look the same! Of course there are genuine smiles in some photos, and I like those, but nowadays I'm not so inflexible. Photos look more fun if the person in them looks like they're actually having fun. Two years ago, you would never have got me to do a silly pose or pull a face for a camera. Today, it's still not my instinct, but I'm quite happy to do it. I won't even un-tag it on Facebook.

The quote from Catherine of Siena really strikes a chord with me. I want to strive for that. I want everyone to strive for that! We've all got growing and learning to do but I think we need to do it in pursuit of who we were made to be, not in pursuit of being like our friend with the nice hair, the great leader at church, the perfect parent down the road, or the sibling with the great grades. Since I started learning to love and embrace who I am, I'm so much happier. My self-esteem is higher than it's ever been. I'm still a quiet person, but that's okay! 

Do you know how valuable YOU are? Do you know that YOU are a gift to those around you? I challenge YOU to be the best version of YOU that you can be. Don't try to be someone else. That's their job. Find and embrace your own strengths and let's see what kind of amazing world we can create when we all do that. 

Ready to set the world on fire?