Always? Even Today?

Hi God,


It's me. I just have a question- Why are some days so hard?  I know, I know, life has its ups and downs, and the tough days really build our character.


But as you know, today was hard. Last night was hard. I know you say in Philippians, "Rejoice always..." But that was so hard today. You want me to rejoice even today?


I realize that I've had a really, really horrible no good year. So days like these should seem insignificant compared to what I've been through. But I just had such a hard time rejoicing and then I felt bad about it.


You know what happened. My blog-friends tried to warn me, others tried to warn me, "Make sure you get your rest." With my dehydration, I should have been keeping well hydrated.


But I thought "Maybe once, just this once, I can do it on my own. I will be just as strong as everyone else. Maybe one time I'll be able to be as strong as those I look up to."


I guess I was wrong. My dehydration got the best of me, my exhaustion got the best of me, and my over-stimulation got the best of me.


Don't get me wrong- I'm okay.... But here I sit... tired, a big gash in my foot from falling and catching it on a sharp edge, my throat sore and my voice lost, fatigued, overwhelmed, and frustrated.


But I still hear that voice that says, "Rejoice always..." Always? Even today?


Even today when I had to miss morning class because of feeling ill, not feeling "up to par" all day teaching, and not having the most-well behaved students in class.


And you want me to rejoice? Even today?


Even when I feel so unaccomplished because I'm not as strong as other people? Because I can't handle things other people could? Because I am so easily over-stimulated and easy to get anxious?


Rejoice? Even today?


I am trying to tell myself- Count your blessings (and I did that yesterday!), and that tomorrow will be better.


But what about today? Rejoice?


Psalm 118:24. This is still YOUR day. It's the day YOU made. It's not about me or about designing it so it's all fine and dandy for me.


Today? Rejoice?


I think I can do that. I consider what you've done in the past, and I know what you are capable of doing in the future.


Even on days like today, that are hard, and not easy to rejoice, your call echoes, "Rejoice always. Even today. It's My day. I made it for you. Enjoy. Find the ways I bless you."


I guess in closure, thank you. For this day. For a reason to rejoice and be glad in today- even when it's hard.